06 September 2008
My Own Story
I ran today. Not far, not for very long, but I got off my butt and ran. Much like my other attempts at running, I found myself wondering why I was putting myself through the torture...burning lungs, itchy legs (thank you, asthma), lightheadedness...good times. I want SO BADLY to be good at running, though, not to mention that I have made the commitment to develop hobbies other than sitting on the couch and reading/watching tv/napping/all of the above. When I was younger, I had a million hobbies...I loved singing, and writing, and drawing...all things that I was good at. I may not have been the best, but I was good enough to like doing them. These days, it seems like by the time I'm done with work and school stuff, I have no energy to do anything. A lot of it, though, seems to do with anxiety. My anxiety levels have skyrocketed during the past year or so-- everything new feels scary to me. It feels like my body's anxiety levels have been tested and drained with all of the newness of the past year, and all of my reserves are gone. Maybe I needed that year to recover. Now I find myself at the point where I want to try some new things--nothing huge, nothing earth-shattering, but at least something that doesn't involve me sitting in my apartment. In a few hours, I'm heading over to the Animal Rescue League for volunteer orientation. That, I'm hoping, will become not only a new hobby, but something that will help me feel less sad about not being able to have a dog in my apartment (boo, apartments!) So, while the anxiety is still there, I'm trying really hard to push myself past it. And play with dogs.
***An update on the Step Out to Fight Diabetes walk: Currently at $800! THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU to everyone who has donated so far! I know we'll hit $1,000!***
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